If you absolutely must have extramarital sex hours into marriage, keep it from your new dad.

If you're getting married this wedding season, don't get too stressed if a few things to go wrong. That's just the universe's way of reminding you that your love is not special because in the grand scheme of things we don't matter. But if your wedding reaches the level of catastrophe attained by the weddings in this list, simply pat yourself on the back for giving your guests a good time. No one will remember your centerpieces, but they'll be talking for years to come about the drunken sucker punch your maid of honor threw at the Justice of the Peace because she didn't like his face. Take a lesson from this list, the only thing better than the perfect wedding is the perfect wedding disaster.
 


"Hahaha yeah it was totally a joke... yeah... I said it as a joke. Yup."
 


Somehow the worst people in this story are the staff who said "peasants with money"
 


"OK, everyone! Ready for the electric slide-off-this-platform-ino-the-lawn?"

 


Something old collapsing, something new bleeding, EMTs borrowed, some baby turning blue.
 


Cold feet sounds pretty bad until you consider the alternative: hot tummies.
 


She insisted on replacing "For richer for poorer" with "Till the keg is kicked" in her vows.
 


'Til death do us part. While alive, it's a minimum of 500 feet at all times.
 


Whoever catches the flaming debris doesn't have to worry about getting married since, in most states, it's still illegal for dead people to marry.
 


So a giant dust storm interrupted your nuptials. It's not like God's trying to send a message or some-- Oh no here come the frogs!
 


The groom knew something was amiss when she couldn't decide which social security number to put on the marriage license.

 


Ease up on the buffet, fatties!

Sources: MSNBC.com | Fox News | BBC News | The Smoking Gun | Metro UK | Boston Herald | Huffington Post | Huffington Post