1. Facebook = The Dung Beetle

The Dung Beetle - The dung beetle collects everyone's shit into an easy-to-read ball, or "Feed." While convenient, it usually just makes you jealous of people with better-looking shit than you.


2. Reddit = The Mosquito 

These ubiquitous creatures sample any content with life left in it, trying to suck out it's lifeforce, or "Karma." They only live for a few days or hours, however, so new ones will return to the same content almost immediately to try and drain it again.

3. Upworthy= The Caterpillar

This uninteresting and boring creature wrapped itself up in a cocoon of silky clickbait. You won't believe what it became next!

4. BuzzFeed = The Fruit Fly

One of the most ubiquitous species on the planet, the fruit fly will seize on any piece of content with any value whatsoever, feeding every few minutes. It can adapt to any environment, even consuming things that only other insects from a place like Albuquerque would understand.

5. Every Real News Site = The Honeybee

Without this insect, human civilization would collapse. It is, of course, going extinct.