someecards.com - I'm bringing my kids to work so they can see why I'm such a bitch when I get home.
Let everyone know you're just as insufferable at home as you are at work.

 

someecards.com - I wish you were less excited about me bringing my daughter to work
Great way to let the creepiest guy in the office know he's the creepiest guy in the office.

 

someecards.com - Sorry your job isn't worth your child missing a day of school to learn about what their father does.
A good education is the first step towards an excruciatingly mundane career.

 

someecards.com - Good luck convincing your kids you do anything
"Daddy is working very hard to write a funny tweet because daddy needs validation."

 

someecards.com - Maybe my disadvantaged kids can convince my boss that I need a raise.
Really go for it, though—rub some dirt on them before work and ask them to pretend to be deaf.

 

someecards.com - Sorry you're unemployed on Take Your Child To Work Day
Also, sorry you're not childless.

 

someecards.com - Take your kids to work day gives me a chance to judge your spawn on something other then their crappy art work.
They probably sing like crap, too. 

 

someecards.com - Sorry your child told your boss what you really think
"Show me how your put your head up your ass like Mommy always says!"

 

someecards.com - I'm letting my son create all my someecards today so he can see what Daddy does all day.
You can spend your day doing the same!

Something slightly less annoying than children >>