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Dad uses hilariously creative strategy to avoid helping child.

This dad has the best possible response to what has got to be one of the more pathetic requests for parental assistance in the history of texting. If you're summoning your father because you're terrified of what is basically the butterfly's boring cousin, you really deserve whatever happens to you. That is, of course, assuming this message isn't actually from a giant, bloodthirsty insect who's learned how to use an iPhone, in which case we are all completely screwed.

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