Call Jesus now for a string of broken promises!
As a daughter of clergy, I have a soft spot for religious groups that try to be cool and appeal to the youth. Still, most religions are ancient and wacky, and trying to squeeze them into a modern-day sensibility usually ends up feeling like pandering—or at the very least involves an excessive use of puns.
The redditor who posted this particular pamphlet hasn't said which group gave it out (which is very Christian of him), but whoever it was made a big, hilarious mistake. If you don't have an iPhone, you may not realize the green text messages on the right are actually those sent by the phone. The white ones on the left come from the person whose name is at the top. In other words, Jesus is too busy for you.
You want salvation? Try back tomorrow. Jesus has places to be.
(by Shira Rachel Danan)
Sources: redditor theqwoppingdead