Don't forget keeping your chin warm in wintertime!

I'm so jealous. How many times have I been standing on the street in New York, wishing I could catch a cab but unable to because my hands were full of designer shopping bags? One-and-a-half million times, that's how many. Do I ever catch one? No, because all the cabs are going to the smart people wearing Fendi Facecocks (it's like The Accommodator for perverts who don't need to worry about price). It doesn't matter how many bags they're carrying, because they just walk out into the street, stick their noses up higher than usual, and wave their rubbery chin-phalluses at the passing taxis. Well, no more! Now, with the Accommodator, I can get Park Avenue chin-dildo service at Chinatown prices. Thanks, Accomodator!

(by Johnny McNulty)

Sources: redditor wtf_shroom