Zac knows what makes touching people's genitals go away: money.
An Australian boy named Zac pinched his little brother's testicles (presumably to prepare the little boy for life in Australia), but then felt bad and wrote this note, which his mother then posted on Facebook. You have to admire the intense sincerity of his apology: sympathy pain, knowing that words aren't enough, money. All the key points are there. Also, we see a bright future in medicine for Zac for recognizing the limits of applying Band-Aids in the general wee-wee region. Either that, or a career in writing apologies for politicians and celebrities who get introuble for bad touches.