Wayne Industries has apparently not yet perfected a military grade anti-perspirant.

In the old days, the worst crime a nerd could commit would be doing homework for a cheerleader if she pretends to be his girlfriend. Those days are over. Nerdy movies like "The Avengers" are making more money than God, and nerdy robots like the Mars Rover Curiosity are soaring into space and attacking Martians with extreme prejudice. Nerds are running the world, and it's time to stop coddling these virgins! Forget everything you ever knew about nerds, and start studying these ten nerd criminals and their nerdy crimes so you don't end up dead in an alley with a pocket-protector lodged in your throat.

 


Could have been worse. "Man stabbed with wand," for example. 

 


Over 20 thousand euros were stolen. No one's virginity was harmed.

 


The only bummer is the guy went Klingon instead of Khan, also robbing the clerk of the chance to shake his fist and scream "Khaaaan!"

 


Plot points like this would have infinitely improved Episodes 1 through 3.

 


His pockets were searched and police confiscated a level 18 charisma and several spells.

 


Sorry but he's a Jedi. He used a light saber to thwart a taser. How the hell is that not Jedi? The headline should read "Jedi Arrested."

 


"What are you in for?" "Murder. You?" "Legos."

 


This was the original inspiration for Breaking Bad but Vince Gilligan decided cancer might raise the stakes a little more than completing the full set of Fantastic Four.

 


Crappiest Spidey costume ever. He should have been arrested for wearing children's pajamas in public. 

Sources: CBS News | The Daily Telegraph UK | Asylum | Yahoo News | The Denver Channel | NBC4i | ABC News | Denver Post | CNN | Petoskey News