How did I get to Carnegie Hall? In an ambulance.
Driving: it's as American as buying factory-made apple pies, but only half as American as not giving a hoot about anyone else. Not all these drivers are American, but none of them are going to be around much longer anyway. So the next time someone in your car is screaming that you're going to get them killed, just reach for your smartphone and pull up this article, then read to them aloud and remember: at least you're not these people.
Tsk, tsk, Amanda Bynes. If we knew what you were famous for we'd boycott it.
As long as I'm wearing camo, no one can see me text!
"Do as I say, not as I txt."
"Easy rider" - what this man desperately hopes everyone is thinking.
This is the mayor of Toronto. So at least we know he'll hit someone with health insurance.
"I'm driving this car and I'm putting my foot down!"
"Let's go back over the speed bumps, that puts her to sleep."
Once you put on clown makeup, society's rules do not apply.
Why do you think I brought my wife? Balance.