Answer: The no alcohol part. Alcohol makes everything smell better.

Scumbags of the world, just stay off Yelp, okay? No one's saying you can't make a scene and get kicked out of a place for being gross or soliciting hand jobs or whatever. I mean, people are saying that, but if you do it you'll just get kicked out and everyone who works there will go home and complain to the people they sleep with and it'll all be in the past. Unless you go and try to crap on the place on Yelp.

Do you think the owners of these businesses aren't getting alerted every time another review pops up? Do you think they're not going to remember the guy who thought his exposed chest hair was issued by the DMV? Before the Internet, public nuisances were just happy to ruin someone's night and then forever hold onto that evening of horrible behavior as a cherished memory. But now they want to shit all over the cake and eat it too (not sure if that's a mixed metaphor or just terrible writing or what, but you get the point). So they take to Yelp, and man does it ever backfire.

After the review was posted on Reddit, the pub owner went so far as to turn the Yelp war into a promotional opportunity. She wrote in the comments: If you come to this bar and say "mark g. is a dick," your first drink...well or draft is on me. if you need me to guide you through our eight taps and over 40 bottles of craft beer, i can do that.

(by Bob Powers)

Sources: Redditor datdouche | Gawker