Archaeologists have discovered the oldest porn on the planet.
BIRDS AND BEES


"Let's do it. Let's fall in love!"

First of all, sorry for assaulting you with an image of two froghoppers doin' it. If you work in a bee hive, these images may be considered NSFW. Said one of the authors who wrote a study on this find, "This one is so rare...and I have seen more than half a million fossils." As titillating as this must be for paleo-entemologists, the biggest revelation from this 165-million-year-old relic (165 million years old!! Way, way before the critters in Jurassic Park) is that nothing has changed. 

The froghoppers are basically the same, and more importantly, the way they mate and the way their genitals look are the same, too. Basically, this is like two people in Pompeii were doing it missionary-style and then archaeologists found them and were like, "yawn." The male is on top, and his manhood is the part towards the rear (left) that's bending down towards the female. That diagonal line in the middle of the photo is the male's leg, not a really impressive phallus emerging from the female at bottom. 

The previous record was a pair of fruit flies locked in sexual congress for 135 million years, according to that same article. Also in that article is the depressing possibility that they weren't mating at all, but just died near each other and were slowly forced into that position by the sediment fossilizing around them. Which will be hard to explain if they're married to other froghoppers. "It's not what it looks like!" "Oh, so what, you just died near her and over millions of years the rock pushed your penis into her vagina? Pack your things, Joe!!!!"

[ Via Newser ]
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