Tonight's forecast is a heavy rain of teenage hormones with a chance of screams.
Poor Al Roker. First he's the butt of fat jokes for decades, then the butt of gastric bypass jokes, then his butt drew attention to itself for its lack of self-control at the White House. On top of all of that, his kid dragged him to a Drake concert in Connecticut. The man's face says it all, and that is the face of a man who has endured early-morning concerts from every jackass to top the charts since the 90s. You're not #TooOld, Al Roker, you're #ExactlyRight for appreciating the horror of people bouncing with their arms crossed while listening to a mopey Canadian. I'm not saying Drake sucks, I'm just saying anyplace young people go is horrible.
Oh crap. I'm officially #TooOld. At 28. If you'll excuse me, I have to go pretend to know about Lou Reed.
P.S., Al Roker really likes Vines for a guy who's #TooOld.
(by Johnny McNulty)