Studies have shown that teams with glittery names perform much shinier.
The story behind this photo was that someone very unwisely gave naming rights over a youth soccer team to the little girls on the team. As a result, the Sparkle Unicorns were born and went on to sign an exclusive sponsorship deal with Lisa Frank notebooks. Ok, so it's pretty much the word of one Redditor, but we ran the picture through r/karmadecay to see if it had ever been on Reddit and we did a Google Image Search and didn't find it anywhere else on the web—which means this story is at least credible enough to run on cable news. Hell, this is probably enough for a Pulitzer these days. No matter what other lies you see in the media, you know this one thing is true: a bunch of girls are on a soccer team named the Sparkle Unicorns, and they almost definitely named it themselves.