I'm going to say "a.) Henry Clay and b.) all of them." (via)
Whoah, what do you think this is, LinkedIn? (via)
This kid is ready to work in cable news. (via)
Also, just a reminder that it usually sounds pretty stupid to describe your small problems as a disaster:
Your Facebook complaints are all that stands between civilization and buying Fascism.
This may be the most literal update-at-an-inappropriate-moment we've ever had. (via reddit)
I don't think it's inte-meant to be with you two, buddy. (via Lamebook)
That big, blurred-out thing? That's a cadaver of someone who donated their body to science.
So, he's like one shade smarter than the guys from Dumb & Dumber. (via Lamebook)
Wow, he sounds like the kind of asshole who would take a selfie at a funeral. (via reddit)
Mike, you're not so good at this 21st Century thing. (via reddit)